Tag Archive | fatigue

Life…What’s it for?

After checking the time on my phone a few times during the night, I finally got up to make coffee at 5:30am. Around 9am, I decided to do laundry and make a small salad to eat ( yes I skipped eggs today).

While waiting for the laundry, I sat on my bed trying to figure out what I wanted to do for the next 5 hours before I had to leave for work. I still need to clean off the spare bed in my room and I have a scarf that I need to finish crocheting. But wasn’t in the mood to do either of those. So instead I just laid down to rest until laundry was done.

I don’t really sleep much, but even if I am awake then I have no energy or motivation to do anything productive. Someone needs to wave a magic wand over my head and turn me into the energizer bunny. Otherwise I could literally just lay on my bed all day playing backgammon and canasta on my tablet. When the highlight of a day and the only reason to wake up is to have coffee and play a game with a computer for 5 hours, then it’s time to find a new way to spend my day…or start taking sleeping pills again in the middle of the night just so I only wake up for work.

It’s days like this that I actually miss being homeless in Georgia. I am almost tempted to call the Twins at “The Well” to get the latest gossip from the neighborhood. Even though I spent a lot of time on my phone while I was at The Well, I got to see other people every day. The twins used to drive me crazy sometimes but they still get excited to hear from me and always ask if I am ever going back there. Weird how you can be homeless but have lots of people around to talk to or help in some way if you needed it, I miss walking around Norwich Street and the park by the river…but I am living in a house across the country with nobody to talk to and no place to walk to except work/starbucks and nothing to look forward to except coffee and backgammon.

People always think that if a homeless person gets a job and moves into a house, then they are moving up in the world. Well sure they will have money as long as they keep the job. But isn’t money supposed to be the root of all evil? What good is having money if you just turn into a hermit hiding in 1 bedroom all by yourself (except when you are working to make more money). What good is money if you have no way or no time to enjoy it. If having money equals happiness, then does that mean only rich people are Happy? Hmm, some rich celebrities don’t always seem so happy on the covers of all those trash papers that you can find by the check out lines in Walmart or some news site on the Internet. So if money doesn’t guarantee happiness, then what the hell does? I have money now, but looked forward to most days more when I was living in my broken-down car in Georgia.

Well I have wasted enough time today (Sunday) I need to get dressed for work. I get out of work tonight at 10pm and have to be back at 8:30 tomorrow morning. Won’t get much sleep tonight. But I like Monday mornings, cuz the store is always busy with deliveries. Actually I would not mind if they had me work from open-to- close. If I am awake anyways, then I might as well be at work doing something productive.

Advertisements

World Sleep Day

March 16th is not only my birthday, it’s World’s Sleep Day. But seeing as it’s a Friday, I will be working. I can guarantee that I won’t be sleeping in late that morning either. Did you know that this last Monday was National Nap Day? It seems that the Monday after most of us change the clocks ahead in the Spring is a day to take a nap. Course that day changes every year…and why is that now in early March? I can remember when I was a kid that it happened in April. Oh well, I am living in AZ now so I don’t have to change clocks. Even though I was surprised that the clock on my phone changed by itself while the one on my tablet did not.

I get email newsletters from the Mayo Clinic, and this week one article they sent me was titled “5 tips for a better sleep”. From their list, my biggest problem might be electronics. Meaning that I need to shut my phone and tablet off at the same time every night. Instead of staring at my screens, I need to just stare toward a blank wall in the dark until eventually I can stare at the insides of my eyelids.

One thing I have read about low-carb/ keto diet is that it helps you sleep better. A diet would have to perform a total miracle for that to happen with me. My sleep habits have been out-of-whack for many years. But even though I can normally spend 20 hours awake every day, doesn’t mean that I will be an energizing bunny all day at work. I have hardly ever been loaded with energy, no matter what kind of diet I was on.

Fatigue is, just basically, a lack of energy, and we get our energy from the food we eat. Our diets are largely dominated by carbohydrate – grains like rice and wheat, potatoes, root vegetables, fruit, sugar etc., and these are broken down into glucose.

It turns out there is another way to fuel your body, using fats.This pathway is largely switched off when your body has a regular supply of carbohydrate (ie. a standard western diet). Back in hunter-gatherer days, life was feast and famine – eat what you can while the going is good, then survive on your body fat reserves when food is harder to find. Nowadays we rarely give our bodies the chance to get truly hungry, often eating out of habit and want rather than need.

I laugh when people say 1. to only eat when you are hungry. 2. Don’t skip meals because your body will go into starvation mode. Oh Jesus christ people, make up your mind because you can’t have it both ways. If I only ate when hungry then I might eat once every few days.

Normally I have breakfast with my coffee in the morning. Mainly it’s a habit to eat then. Today breakfast was at 4am. It is now after 11:30pm and while I am waiting for the Tylenol PM to kick in and knock me into sleepy dreamland, I am munching on pork rinds dipped in Guacamole. No I ain’t hungry, just bored. I took the sleeping pill around 11pm and it usually takes about 2 hours afterwards to finally fall asleep. If I am lucky, I might sleep 5-6 hours.

Now if the wifi at home doesn’t let me post this tonight, then I will have to walk up to Starbucks and use their free public internet service tomorrow. Seeing as this is my weekend, I will also need to do laundry and finish organizing my closet but I just didn’t have enough energy or motivation to do it today.

And just to keep track of the weightloss: I am down to 172# today (Tuesday 3/13)